I Almost Got Away With It

The year was 2005, junior year of High School. It was when I first started to experiment with the sales of narcotics. I was young, dumb and determined. My mother would give me everything she could but my appetite for material things started to grow the more and more I got into the crowd. I wanted the expensive designer jeans, new sneakers before they hit stores, and I also wanted to live a certain lifestyle of having my own. Naive to the fact that I was young and there was only so much of independence one could perceive.

My mother use to give me an allowance a day. She taught me, "A man never leaves his house without money in his pocket." And that's exactly what I did. A friend of mine who lived right down the street sold marijuana. He always would tell me that he could get me started only when i had enough money. So i began to save the money my mother would give me and got my first half an ounce of haze. I started to move it around in school and my some of my friends would connect me to their friends. So on and so forth.

Story Time With The Boys

This one night hanging out with my friends we started up a conversation about some bad sexual experiences we had. I spoke about this one time in high school when i went to a party and picked up a girl.
It was a house party, a good one at that. The house was packed and they were playing reggaeton all night.  There was this one girl that kept eye'ing me the whole time. One of my friends pushed me towards her and from that instance we started dancing. I don't know if you guys remember high school house party but it would have taken a truck to move me from how raunchy we were dancing. I swear to you the dye of my jeans have to be imprinted till this day on that wall. She turns around puts one leg up and we were basically dry humping. She got real close to my neck, i could feel her sweating.
She then whispered in my ear "Let's get out of here."
Its not like i was living alone, i was a senior in high school, i lived with my grandparents. But i didn't care who i was living with i was going to take this home and then take this down.
And then it happened.

Asshole Chronicles: The E-Break-Up

Asshole Move #23: Sending an e-mail to break up

Cleaning out my e-mail account i ran into something i forgot i even wrote. A copy of a break up letter that i had sent to a girl that i was going out with senior year of high school. The worse part is not even that i sent her an email breaking up with her but it was a t-mail, from my sidekick.

I met her through one of my friends that i had 3rd to 4th period math class with. She was a live wire, i mean she really kept me on my toes. I'll never forget that first night we spoke on the phone she was actually having an argument with her ex.
"Hold on, my ex is on the other line bothering me." is what she would tell me. I thought it was crazy but it excited me. The first time speaking to her and she was already opening up to me, telling me about her past relationships and experiences with men. Her strategy was to be completely honest with me and in return i was going to do the same.

Asshole Chronicles: Walk Away

I'll never forget the time that I pulled my first "asshole" move. I was 14 years old and i went on my first date. She was a Junior in High School and we met through my best friends sister, who introduced me to her. She was from a all girls catholic school, petite, short hair, delicate and well mannered. Did it help she was also a freak?
This girl had me talking some of the nasty stuff late night on the phone. She was the one who introduced me to "phone bone".

Four Twenty

Society calls it National Earth Appreciation Day, us stoners call it...

We just call it a reason to get high. Am I wrong?